how i wish
you could have said
only the things you meant
and mean only the things
you did not say..
how i wish you just didn't stay
how i wish we could get on
like hazelnuts and chocolate
and i could melt into you each night
how i wish i was wrong about you
wrong in trusting you
wrong in holding you upon pedestal
on pedestal
i was praying a few nights ago
on my knees
and then on my hands
my body felt wasted
and i was drudging for a well
i was asking that we could be together
and i wouldn't have to leave
no, you wouldn't have to leave
no one gets what's happening
no one gets into my head
"i'm so sorry" they whisper
in the corridors
how i wish i was intuitive
i wish i was not fooled
how i wish i had not drooled
how i wish i did not ink your name
and then make you turn
how i wish i was not nude
and people did not see me through
how i wish we'd just have got on
like hazelnuts and chocolate
this entire lifetime
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