~ staying afloat, a day at a time ~

Monday, August 29, 2011

How many days do you feel like you're alone? 
and no one could possibly understand you? 

Is it so bad, then, to be misunderstood? Pythagoras was misunderstood, and Socrates, and Jesus, and Luther, and Copernicus, and Galileo, and Newton, and every pure and wise spirit that ever took flesh. To be great is to be misunderstood
          – Ralph Waldo Emerson

everything is mangled.. my head is swerving
my world is pulled apart
with unheard promises un-kept
with his heart unkempt
no words are exchanged
and a life does not come to be
because he is not a man
he is a child

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

if iffity if..

"If wishes were horses,
baby, we'd ride into the sunset."

If only.

One of my fav poems of all time is Rudyard Kipling, but do not mistake the quote above to flow lucidly from Kipling's pen. 'If' was always there in the dark and lamentable phases in my life, to rethink what's going oh, so wrong.. I kept telling myself, if you can get through this..

"... which is more.. you'll be a (wo)Man, my son (can't completely rebuff the poet)."


Sunday, August 21, 2011

Closing in on nine..

Thought I'd put together a few of my bf's favourite things..
Drawing close to the nine's.. Can't believe it, on most days ;)

Knowing he'll love it already.. ;)


Romance and peonies...

Some days I think I'm still a kid, trapped in some imaginary sitcom, my father always warned me about what 'FRIENDS' would do to me. He insisted I watch the news instead. I can never forget the way he'd fake-laugh when the audience on set (read laughter machine) would.

I tend to romanticize everything and figment-ize the future; what I could change, what could easily dispose of my current situation and start anew, be brand new. Be the me who is someone... else. That must sound absolutely delusional. When I wake up to another Sunday, I really want to wake up somewhere else, where everyday's a sight to take in, where having waffles soaked in nutella is not a sin and where ruins are only the good part of Grecian monuments. They say if you stand in front of the columns on an especially breezy day, the dead will tell you stories and their words will teach us the true meaning of life. Or maybe I'm romanticizing history. 
Okay, I am.

When I get married, I want peonies and candid snapshots and a first dance that's not awkward where the rest of the world just blurs away if only for a moment. I also want to wake up in Paris and go down to the cafe and sit in my regular spot and on a whim decide to hop a train to Bunol, in time for the festival. C'mon let me dream. What's wrong with a little romance?

I dare you to not love them   :)

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Pledging allegiances

They'll talk about you nonetheless, you can do what you want and you can do what they want.. they'll still talk. You stand in a vacuum. You hear the lyrics in Dylan's songs, you're charged.. You want to change the world, so you google preferences that adjust to your personality. You take up a flag and fight a two-hour cause and come home to watch a rerun of Dharma & Greg. Yes, I'm a nineties cliche.
You say you're a European soul and you feel the need to be on your own with a one-way ticket to some Parisian hide-out and fight the good fight, eat bacterial cheese, drink wine that's not red and jump off an open cliff into a sea bluer that the Spaniard's eyes, dance in a fountain for the amusement of people who do not know you and go into a sex-shop because you are now finally, of age. And let me assure you on most days I will join you. But not today.
I see a fire burning on my way home, a fire in the hearts of youth everywhere. But I tell you the fire will burn out, a man will die and your dreams will be crushed. Pope teaches of an 'eternal' hope. But you know what they really say about hope. It withers and dies before its time and you carry your dreams in a gunnysack that your gran' gave you when you were eight.
With oft fleeting optimism I say to you; fight for what you believe in and stay, like a loyal dog. Do not let your head wander, do not fancy a pair of jeans. Stay and argue, question and trust. Pledge your allegiance.
Give us hope. Give me hope. 

Sunday, August 14, 2011

i tread

i tread life's path complacently
i tread through its unpleasant phases
i make my travels worth the while
i tread towards a hopeful happy place
i know what it takes to please me
i tread on through the awkwardness...
i dream of Chile.

Unanswered queries fog the mind
i tread life's path warily.
i can never seem to let loose
i drink champagne and regret it
i tread past concert halls
i say i want to live the day dream
i pull away instead
i dream of another me


am back.. bt i can never be certain for how long..