post midnight

a faint memory patches through
post midnight
almost every second night

and the back of my neck
feels a raspy breath
filled with urgency

my fingers try to hold onto it
when i came to
i remind myself
there's nothing to hold onto

though the memory is faint
it exists
tearing down my imagination,
my wonder-filled tomorrow

should you listen
and follow through
you may get to hold onto more
than just a memory

but post midnight
your body is weak
your mind is weaker

i need to let the pain
change hands
if for a brief moment
say that rasp is mine
and your body is immersed
in a cold sweat

you look perplexed
somehow bored
no.
angry.

and with everything in you
say
you understand
once

post midnight
every other night
i go back and forth
memory to
existence